Saturday, March 12, 2011

Ambersbane - To Summer, to Youth, to Music

So I'm a teenager, I'm hanging out with my teenager friends, and there's alcohol involved. Lots of alcohol - not as in copious amounts of one or two brands of beer and a few bottles of wine, but say, a bottle each of just about anything you can imagine - six different kinds of flavored vodka, types of schnapps that I didn't even know existed, bourbon, brandy, and a bottle of scotch. I remember looking at the scotch and thinking "no, that stuffs too heavy for me." I also remembering hearing a whisper in my mind, saying "not yet... not yet. But soon."

Five years later, Johnnie Walker came into my life.

But this isn't about a scotch mix. This isn't a mix that's particularly classy, or even all that strong - it's a drink mix created by an adolescent boy who is acutely aware that there is a larger world out there past small-town Iowa, but who had no idea what it might look, smell, sound or taste like. It's been refined, and modified, and I hope improved, but the core of the recipe is one of exuberance, of "Do Anything" experimentation. Its a drink that tastes the way your favorite pop song from the summer of whatever year you lost your virginity in sounds like - probably not that complex, probably a little too sweet, and maybe it doesn't hold up to time with repeated tastings (listening),  but for what it is, for the time its meant to exist in for you, its perfect.

This drink is to your taste buds what "Alex Chilton," by the Replacements, is to your ears.

So. We're in the basement, and we're trying various liquors, and trying them in different combinations. Most of them were terrible, and the ones that weren't were ones we'd heard of before - Rum Runners, Screwdrivers, White Russians, things like that. Kid stuff. We weren't trying to conduct alchemy here, and we were playing as much as anything else.

But then, I found it. Just the right combination of liquors and additives, in the right proportions. Mixed in a glass, then poured into Dixe cup shots. They were passed around. Maybe we should have made a toast to youth, but we were too young to know that. So we shot them back.

The only one who didn't like it was my friend Amber. Instantly, the drink had a name.

So here's what you do:

You'll need two different kinds of vodka, a decent-quality plain vodka (I've made it with everything from Svedka to Grey Goose, so its really up to you and your wallet), a cherry-flavored vodka (UV has worked the best for this, though there are plenty of brands I have yet to try), Kahlua, and hazelnut flavoring syrup, lightunsweetened cream, as well as about two handfuls of ice (chips would be better than cubes).

Important - do NOT substitute cherry flavoring syrup for the cherry vodka. It makes the drink intolerably sweet, and the vodka acts to both cut the drinks actual density, as well as add a little extra kick. I also think it provides a better aftertaste than cherry syrup. Also, cherry syrup just really looks like congealed blood to me. I get them confused sometimes.

Hmm. That would explain why that one batch came out salty. It would also explain where Karen, and those twenty minutes I seem to have lost, got off to. Ahh, memories.

In a mixing glass, throw in three shots of plain vodka, one shot of cherry vodka, about a tablespoon and a half of Kahlua, and two teaspoons of hazelnut syrup, and about half a cup of cream. Stir the liquid ingredients together by themselves first with a spoon (make sure you get a good whirlpool going), and then add the ice chips and shake it like it's the last high school dance you'll ever go to and you want people to remember you for something besides that time you fell asleep in Chem I and woke up with streamers of snot running between your nose and the lab table.

Let the ice melt - this is why you want chips, rather than cubes, because it'll take longer for them to melt and they'll do that nasty layered separation thing, and even when you mix it back together, nobody wants to drink anything that ever looked like that. The ice will have chilled the glass (ideally, you should get a bit of condensation on the sides - especially if its summer. And really, this is a summer drink, even as thick as it is), and it will have thinned it out a bit. Since Ambersbane is meant to be a shooter drink, thickness is a bit of a concern, and you don't want a milkshake by the end of this - think the density (but not the texture) of pulpy orange juice. If you don't like pulpy orange juice, you and I can't ever hang out together. Pour drinks into shot glasses (you'll have enough for plenty of shots, or a shot each for plenty of people).

Don't make our mistake. Do a toast, for anything. To youth, to joy, to summer, to love, to the fading hours of Black Friday when everyone has just gotten off work, to each other, to yourselves, to the future. Ambersbane is for celebrating. It's too sweet, too thick, and too young-blooded for anything else.

Musical accompaniment: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8XR6nrSV3k